The week was a long and difficult one. Work was overwhelming, working 14 hours one day with 15 minute lunch and no breaks. And it was the week I work 4 12's instead of 3. In addition to the physical difficulty we ran out of phone money, and I was broke. Still catching up on bills, I was down to about $25 and gas was needed in the car to get my son to school. Now there was $6.72. So no phone calls. I had seen my husband last weekend, gave him the heads up that we were going to be out of funds. But when the day came, it was heartbreaking to get three attempts from him calling. I prayed for him to be okay, prayed that he knew I loved him and missed him too. I cried myself to sleep that night. Good thing I was exhausted, it didn't take long.
My week also sucked because I worked a day, then off a day, hardly time to rest and recuperate, usually only happens every couple of months, but the week sucked. As exhausted as I was, I was having some trouble sleeping, mind turning over the possible outcomes of Harris County court, I finally broke out a bottle of wine and one glass was enough to help me sleep. I don't drink often, so I am easy.
Wednesday was my Friday, I was so glad to have my week over and Thursday is payday. I sent my son to Walmart and spent the last of the money on a pint of Blue Bell for me and a bag of chips for him, I felt better and slept.
Thursday, I was up at 6am, got son off to school, money on his lunch account, money on phone account, money on Wesley's books, he is out of stamps, paper, etc...paid bills...finally catching up!!!, but still broke, but a little left for a few wants. The dogs have been neglected and out of control. Ordered flea medicine for 2 cats and 3 large dogs, ordered ear mite medicine, and 2 shock collars! I know what you are thinking, but do the research, you only have to shock them once or twice, they behave quickly, and occasionally only need a vibration if they do not heed to warning words. I have a very stubborn pitbull. He is also an amazing guy. I will maybe share his story another day. All the animals are rescues and have stories. His is especially awesome.
After I put money on the phone account I waited for hubby to call. He knew it was payday, but probably didn't want to call too early. Finally, at 10 he calls. We had a great talk, then things went south when I told him his motorcycle was still in the driveway, not the garage, it is up hill, and I couldn't push it, I thought I would have battery fixed quick, but it turns out it was dead. I knew I would need to get another, so today, being payday, I planned to take it to get it checked at O'reilly's and probably buy a replacement. He fussed at me and called my son a pussy for not being able to push it into the garage, I was embarrassed, mad and told him to go to his meeting, he said fine and hung up. My mouth fell open, and then I cried. I was so happy to finally talk to him and it ended, a 15 minute, $15 phone call with him hanging up on me. Wow. I took a shower and went to run errands. He called a hour later, after his meeting to apologize, we tried to talk it out a bit, it was awkward. I knew he over reacted, he apologized, now I just needed to figure out why it upset me so much. I told him I felt humiliated, not sure why. He apologized again, and I suggested we hang up, I get over myself and we talk later when we can enjoy it.
He called this evening, he apologized again, said it was the lack of control that caused him to overreact. It is terrible to spend the precious time, and money for phone calls, squabbling over silly things, but it happens about once a week. He feeling his life out of control, desperate to have some control or say over home. I, feeling overwhelmed with having to keep everything up on my own. Both occasionally seep into the conversation.
I usually write every day, but I had been out of stamps too. I got stamps and wrote him a letter and got it into the mail today. It was a very productive day. I even treated myself to a mani/pedi, it was gloriously relaxing. Tomorrow I will clean and so some laundry, with gloves, don't want to mess up the pretty nails. Did I mention my hands are beat up from changing the oil in my motorcycle? Don't even get me started. Time to go to bed, I will write this weekend, should be nice, I actually have 4 days off in a row, rainy weather to watch movies and nap with....throw in a candle, some music...yes.
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